Don't know how to start this story but what i know is after 9 years of unforgiveable feeling... today the deep black hole inside my heart has been filled up becoz' the final words - "love you too".

 

I was an exchange student to USA during the year 2000-2001... stayed with 3 American families... first family was in KS, i stayed there for a months to prepare myself before i had to live in a real American world for the rest of the year. Then i moved to stay with second family which was in CA (this supposed to be my final family for the rest of the year) I stayed there for 8 months with the feelings unloved and unwanted. The neighbour, i would called my-Godsend-family, offered me a home so I did not hesitate to accept it. The day my 2nd host mother heard that I wanted to move to stay next door was the day I planed to move... I didn't tell her earlier becoz' i thought my area-representative officer will help me sort this out with her... i finished packed my bags, my 2nd host mother was ironing the clothes in her bedroom... i went into her room, telling her what i was going to do is the hardest part of my life. I told her that I'm sorry but i wanted to move to stay with next door people... she lost her temper, pointed finger at me and told me to leave her house immediately. I was shocked... didn't know what to do or say... i cried and pulled all my luggages downstair... who would ever thought that exchange student life will ever happen to face with this kind of situation???!!!! I remember i cried for the rest of that evening. A week after, I wrote a letter to her and put it in her post box saying sorry and please do not hate my-godsend-family becoz' i was the one who started the problems... Not too long after that she called me up and asked me to go over to her house to get a letter from my friend... I was nervous to meet them again... not sure of what would happen and surely the feeling toward this family had changed since the day i was kicked out... from bad to worst. Even though that day passed smoothly and after I came back to Thailand i received a few e-mails from her... but the feeling inside my heart already got a deep black hole... unforgiveable + unforgetable.

 

That's a long introduction to this short story... today my boss wasn't around so i got time to go on Facebook... i saw her still online so i chatted with her... talked about life and family, she's now part of Asante Africa Foundation, Inc which is an East African Children's Education Fund www.asanteafrica.org/ she said children there like her finger nails and like to touch her (just like those people who touch Jesus becoz' his power will go into their body and then they shouted "I touched him"). She is doing this becoz' it helps her to feel better after her daughter died last few years. Dad still have to travel becoz' of business but not as much as when i was there. Another exchange student left to stay in another city... so she's alone. We chatted for almost one hour... and i told her to go to bed becoz' it was already late in USA. I said Good night and end with "Love you, MUACH". She stopped typing for a while and replied "love you too"... somehow I felt these words really come out from her heart and we already got over that unforgiveable feeling... 9 years after... my deep black hole has been filled... this story is still unforgetable but it has already been forgiven.